In the spirit of TAO

I attended my first day of class last Monday and lo and behold my second favorite TAO showed up. It certainly was a blast from the past.  J is an interesting character. I'll call him Jamie for the purposes of anonimity. Jamie who manages to not only irritate me but also my near and dear friend Steve (which takes quite a lot of work because he's a pretty tolerant guy). Jamie has been in and out of classes with me for the past four years of my two year program.
He's a tall, lanky guy who saunters in wearing a faded and holey "I am root " t-shirt (for you non geeks out there root = all powerful  ).  This shirt is complemented by his two sizes two big baggy jeans and his Shaggy from Scooby Doo beard type thing on his angular face. He always talks fast. So fast that you have to really pay attention to actually hear every word. It's like he's in a race to out talk you before you have a chance to get a word in edgewise. He looks like a meth addict or an auto-body shop reject because his fingers are permanently grimy.
Our instructor  ... is more than a match for him with his verbal judo skills so I'm not too worried when the lecture starts. I am more worried about how much lecture I will get to hear since Jamie spotted me and oriented himself in front of me in the crowded classroom.

Jamie knows everything, has done it better, smarter, faster or more dangerously than you have. Our instructor is outlining what we will be doing in class "We will be utilizing network protocol analyzers to see if we can observe and capture packets thereby obtaining information to prevent someone from accessing our network." The non geek version of that sentence loosely translates to" we're gonna stick this program on your computer that grabs what you send out over the internet. we're gonna sort through it to find out jucy bits of information."

Jamie turns around and launches into a conversation about how they make these new wireless access points that are dual configured. One side is to be for a public wifi (say like at Panera Bread) and one side set to private (like you lived in an apartment above your Panera Bread franchise). Then he blathers on about how you can take that and use a program called Hakkey (sp I haven't checked this out) and reprogram both sides of this device and make a wireless tap and see everything on the network once you get it physically in range of our fake Panera's network.
I can see the two guys that sit next to me. Their eyes glaze over and they furtively  glance around him desperately trying to hear Pope's assessment of the rest of the course matrix.  I smile and nod and he shuts up. 
We get a bit of a break to do some review questions out of our first chapter. Jamie turns around to ask me about how I am and to further entertain me. "Man it's good to be back. I got so bored in the auto-body program. It was just too easy to fix stuff. " I smiled .. this guy drives a rusted out 1979 brown and tan Chevy pickup with a dent in the door.  He keeps talking not letting me acknowledge his last statement . I keep writing I've already done these questions but it makes me look busy.  " So how's Scuba ? he asks raising an eyebrow "You all still hangin' out all the time? before I can answer him he adds "Yeah I miss him working for me here. I still have his number in my phone I really need to get a hold of ole' Scuba." 
Inside I laugh and think I bet he wishes you'd lose his number ... Jamie held no position of responsibility and he got fired from the job.  I only manage to get in a "Yep we talk all the time." before Jamie launched into another series of prattling about how he is going to buy a house and how he can get a loan from a bank without having a credit check.  He doesn't shut up the rest of the hour making comments about how he's done everything on the course matrix and so this should be easy. He also gives me unsolicited advice on how to get a boyfriend by finding a guy and feeding him.
I smile this should at the very least be entertaining... I think.

China Blue and the time warp

Last night I went to the Roadhouse (yeah I know that could be a Jim Morrison song line ripoff) to see my friends Chris Hill, Craig Hill , Steve Mason and Clark Carter play for a reunited band show to benefit another mutual acquaintance Jeff Carlson who is having some medical issues.
Hoping to introduce my gang of new friends to part of my past and some kick ass rock n' roll I began to gather up a group to head out to the show.
Three of us arrived at the beginning of the evening and I happily introduced Amanda and Krista to the band and some of the old crowd of folks I used to run with back in the early 90's. I think Kat put it the best when she said "Good Grief do you know EVERYONE in here?" . In all seriousness I only knew half the bar. I never realized before last night how many people I do know !
I realized that our crowd had definitely settled down ... and I mean settled. Pictures of families were being flashed around and hardly anyone were pounding down the booze like they used to. We all seemed to have suffered a bit of "middle aged spread".
I in my teal sequined top was the shiniest person there ...at least until the skinny girl in the backless copper shiny top arrived. Since she was skinnier than me and could pull it off I quietly slid into second place on the shiniest. Well after all I did show up to be noticed.
As I scanned the room I ascertained that me and my girls were definitely the hottest in the room.
After getting my greetings from all the guys in the band I didn't need to worry about how I would be received. Rick Bean my ex's old roommate spotted me and charismatically swept in to greet me. He as usual was dressed to the nines in a trendy shirt with skulls on it. I almost asked him if he still shopped out of the International Male catalog but didn't. To give you an idea about Rick he is the eternal bachelor. This guy once wore a completly (and I stress COMPLETLY) platinum colored suit to a New Year's Eve party.Rick made the rounds telling everyone that I had arrived. So one by one the old crowd trickled over or acknowledged me with waves and nods.
Steve was behind his drum kit testing out mics and his face lit up when I approached the stage "Hey you came ! " "Like I would miss this " I bantered back. It was hard to believe how much time had passed since I first met him in 1989. Chris was bustling around being nervous as he usally is before a show worrying about how he would sound. He chatted with me about how I had been since I last saw him. Craig gathered me into a hug and was fussing about how they would probably suck after only having had two rehersals and the rest of theguys were chatting and tuning and chatting. I giggled and reassured them that if they were as good as they used to be it would sound great.
We headed to the back to take a seat. I knew that the way the sound was sitting up front we would be blasted out of our chairs.
After a late start they cranked up the smoke machine and darkened the stage. The lights came on in a blaze as they rocketed into their set. I had to hand it to the guys even in a small club they always tried to replicate a big rock show as much as they could. They played alot of their old set ...the heavier part. Thin Lizzy 78' Jailbreak, Alice in Chains, The Cult, Judas Priest , Black Sabbath ala Ronnie James Dio, Phil Collins. Chris did "Shadows " and I was so proud that he nailed the high note in the song everytime. I remembered listening to him practice that over and over because it was so hard to sing. They also added "Heaven's Trail " by Tesla to the set. I was nostalgic for some of my favorites that got left out ... Journey, Kiss, Kings X but what I got satisfied my rock n roll craving for awhile.
I saw Bobby Hoskins and found out he went to high school with Terrie's husband. That was funny small world this is. The summation is No I haven't slept with him, he was the drummer for one of Chris and Craig's other bands Ceremony and while a good friend he wasn't my type.
The night with its lights and smoke machine transported me back to the old days. Chris' husky voice floating out over the crowd. Craig in his bass playing crouch , Steve muttering to himself on the drums to keep perfect time and Clark ...well Clark became a tall guitar god his fingers dancing over the frets perfectly. He definitely had improved over time.
My stomach did happy little flip flops with every song I knew and I couldn't stop my body from moving.
I went up on Nazereth's "Soulshaker" to dance with Amanda to try to get some of the old spark started after Chris' calls to "get up and dance". Chris and Steve shot me a smile and a nod as I tried to lead the parade. In the old days all the girls would gather at the front to gyrate wildly to the music. This time it was like their asses were superglued to the chairs. It was my first break into current reality. After the song we trailed back to our seats where Rick hugged me and congratulated me on having the guts to get up and dance. I wasn't drunk enough to do it again.
Around 11:30 Amanda, Krista , Terrie and her hubby all decided that the night had been late enough for them and headed for home. Kat was on her way by that point so I milled around the crowd and talked to my old bridesmaid Stacey Bach. I almost didn't recognize her husband Jim but after I got past the headband he was wearing I realized he was looking REALLY OLD.
My ex showed up looking really rough or as Kat put it "Fugly" I snickered at that and we had a nice discussion about following hearts over logic. I didn't look at him the rest of the evening. Kat told me later that he couldn't stop staring at me. It was nice that I didn't notice that I was too engrossed in the music and having a good time. He did swoop over out of the darkness and say Hi its nice to see you before continuing on to sit with his old FB Kelly Carpenter.
I continued to stare at the stage dazzled by their stage presence . Chris standing on tables , doing his "crucifixtion" pose , roaming around the crowd and brandishing the mic stand like an ancient warrior's weapon. Kat's wide eyes and comments were just too funny she said "I feel like I'm in a time warp. What is with all the 80's clothes?" I chuckled Kat I laughed you have to remember that the average age of this crowd is over 36. In fact at 36 I was probably one of the youngest in there ...well at least except for the waitresses in their hotpants and assless chaps.
Too soon the music stopped and the buzz of the sound system faced into the background and we were all exposed in the harsh light of the house lights. We had arrived back in the present . The guys would be going back to their new seperate projects and I would be going back to my new reality . I exchanged last "goodbyes and nice to see you's " before walking out the door into the cool night air. You really can never go back....but it certaintly was a helluva shot at it.